Doesn’t that guy know he is on TV? I mean come on, dude. Literally anything you do is captured on footage. Also, that guy is a professional athlete… I can only assume he is able to rip your arm off and then beat you silly with it. And I’m not kidding. I think that if he had the time of day he would rip your arm off and beat you silly with it. But he didn’t do that because he knew he was on TV. You’re a dummy.
What I learned About Homosexuals From a Crazy Lady in the Subway
Here are a few nugget of information a crazy woman had to share with everyone on the subway about homosexuals and their ability to defend themselves. She seemed kind of upset about their ability/ right to defend themselves.
1. They can and will defend themselves (Why is she worried about this? Is she attacking them frequently?).
2. They will punch the hell out of you (Apparently they are awful at kicking).
3. They will really punch the hell out of you (I think a homosexual may have punched the hell out of her after she attacked them).
4. They will fuck up your eye (It is a tactical move and probably effective).
5. They will fuck the aforementioned eye (… I just don’t know…).
